By: Rafeea Tamboli & Raymond Chang
Preface: The following is an accurate representation of what happened between Rafeea and Raymond while they were trying to write an article about love. Just like love is complicated, this conversation reflects the complications that arise when discussing love.
Raymond: Have you seen the video, “Why ‘love’ is a useless word – and three alternatives,” from The School of Life?
I want to touch on some ideas mentioned in that video during some parts of the article.
Also, have you ever experienced those texting highs, which is basically explained by the Greek term, Eros, mentioned in the video? Texting highs are where in the first couple weeks of texting someone, every conversation is really long and it’s almost like the day revolves around the cycle of receiving and sending texts, but then after the “honeymoon” period, it becomes repetitive or bland. I want to talk about that a little bit as well and how just because the “honeymoon” period ends doesn’t mean the relationship is growing weaker. It is just entering a new stage.
Rafeea: I did see that video! The English language has so many words but it doesn’t have enough words to describe variations of love. Love is not something that can be encapsulated by one four-letter word. Other languages, like Greek, have words to represent different shades of love. Maybe we need to create our own categories of “love.”
There seems to be a set definition of love––being involved romantically with someone. Yes, I think I’ve experienced brief texting highs. While I cannot speak to the “honeymoon” period (maybe you can Raymond, hehe), I have seen friends go through the “honeymoon” period. They think that they are in love, but in reality, they are just a bunch of hormonal teenagers.
Raymond: Well, I wanted to take it more in the direction that people give up on love too quickly. More specifically, I want to talk about how when the texting high is over, people just think everything’s over. I think you’re more focused on how they think they’re in love too quickly.
Maybe we can split the article into two sections, where one section talks about falling in love too soon, and the other about giving up on love too soon? Wait actually, we can mold it into one idea because we both want to talk about the extremes. You know the saying where when you’re in love the highs become higher and the lows become lower? Or I guess for this article, more along the lines of there being a lot of extremes, both high and low, in relationships, and people overreacting to those peaks. So when the lows hit, they give up too quickly, and when the highs hit, they declare it as love too quickly.
Yo, what if we compared it to people leaving a beach during low-tide and going there during high-tide? Lol, sorry, random idea.
Rafeea: I have never heard that saying. Are you sure that’s correct? Anyway, I like the idea of talking about the highs and lows. I definitely feel like people overreact to the highs by thinking that they are “in love” but as soon as the lows come, people throw the idea of love right out of the window. It’s important to also add that this isn’t the case with all people so that we don’t offend anyone lol; clearly, there are couples who were high school sweethearts and still have a happy love life years later.
I definitely am not a qualified “love expert,” but based on what I’ve seen at school, I just don’t think that most of us are at that point in our lives where we can truly say that we love someone. By throwing around that word so carelessly, it gets devalued. Then, when someone actually means it and says, “I love you,” it doesn’t seem special.
While Rafeea and Raymond’s article never came to fruition, they thought that maybe their banter says more about love itself than an article ever could.